I'm drifting away from everyone.

Hihi! I'm sad :( I didnt do Sincerely Jane properly. Beginning already make mistake. HAHA cuz i was dreaming. Of a split second my mind was blanked out because of the Audience. Then ah, hmmm o.o YA they kept laughing too. WHAT'S SO FUNNY. It's a performance not a comedy damnit. Did we really do so badly that they have to keep laughing non stop?! When Bellda dropped her hat, everyone laughed until the next phrase man. Like what is up with y'all?! Try going up and perform and you'll know how we feel. Also didnt get to take ANY photos because had no time. Make up also anyhow put then go up stage. Worst thing was we had to wait for like 15min or so before our turn! We couldve just stayed in the dance studio to make up la. Aigo..

Went home straight after school because i was planning to meet Jai and Liqian after bathing. But when i reached home, i was locked outside the house for 15minutes or so and i was SO FED UP! Ok i know i'm being very annoying here trying to bitch about what happen but seriously no justice is done to me. My parents should just give me the keys la. If only the NEW maid didnt come to this house, there's seriously peace and quiet. -.- I got so tired being angry with them that i had no mood to go out and so, i told Jai to meet up tomorrow instead.

I'm not gonna eat Dinner. I wanna slim down. The determination and motivation is back but i know it'll be gone soon. Mother bought rowing machine and the bicycle thingy that you'll find at the gym on Sunday. Ima row the sweat out of me later! Hahaaa..

So i watched Dream Team that i recorded on Sunday. I didnt know it's the same episode that i watched on the internet last week. However, without subtitles. Hahaaa, i hope Dream Team comes Singapore with Taemin and Alexander. They are just so cute la! :P Ah in any case, SHINee is coming Singapore! I should be contented enough. THE TICKETING HAVENT EVEN COME OUT LAH. I everyday checkcheckcheck HAHA, cuz i scared later people also as kanchiong as me then ticket no more... Aigo aigo.

Yayayayay SHINee coming singapore woohoowoohoo! Heheee~!

Shining stars

Gosh my Audition is not working AGAIN. So annoying. I think my blog is telling me, "YOU BETTER UPDATE, OR ELSE!?!?#!*^@!&$^" Yeah so, it's "Or else" is to dc my Audition. Pathetic la. Now cannot go in already.

I havent been doing anything interesting this past few days. Its just school and a BBQ on Saturday. It was fun because of the dumbest jokes created by Kahsiang and group. Haha totally nothing to write man seriously. There's performance tomorrow and i'm only thinking about that now. I feel like i've forgotten to do something but i dont know what. Cuz i'm like so free now.

I'm kinda happy because i'm gonna use my Polaroid tomorrow! HAHA. Ima take all the poses of Sincerely Jane. I already thought of what to take and i'm super happy la seriously hehehehe... Also, i've been crazing over SHINee still ^_^ they are awesome people okay.

I dont know who that girl is but she is super extra. LOL.

Charismatic Minho & Maknae Taemin (L)

So i've also been looking at photos of hair. I DONT KNOW WHY ALSO. So envious la, especially this girl's. I totally love her hair length and colour man. It's so Sitifarah's hair, BUT I LIKE LOR! Sitifarah and Bellda's hair best man!! I miss my fringe wtf. Dont like the person who cut my fringe... I told him to keep length but cut the left side shorter. HE GO CUT UNTIL EVERYTHING SHORT!!!! Now i have to wait until probably Nov for my fringe to grow back again and then ask someone else to cut. Nonsense person.

Surrender your heart.

You know, i want to blog but i really got nothing to write sial. HAHA. Okay let me recall what i did the past 3 days...

So i went out with Jazreel and Jonas. Watched Step up 3!!! It was so awesome!! Omg i just love dance so much hahaha~! Even though we didnt do anything much, i still thought it was meaningful. Its been so long since i saw Jazreel. Obviously, she is still a pretty as ever :) Jonas got angry halfway thru becuz of Jazreel HAHAHA :P Nah it was nothing. Just a small joke. I wanted to stay on longer to talk to Jazreel, since i havent seen her for so long. But yeah it was time to go home. Owell... Ima see her this coming Saturday!! But she's gonna come so late la damn her. 6.30pm?! -.- Herh i shall cycle with Charlotte first lor!! :P

Sunday, as usual, boring. Morning had guitar but i was damn shagged out. HA why? Cuz i have bad flu and sorethroat. Didnt went for aural. Hehehe.. Slept all the way from 1plus to 5plus in the evening. Eh sick what. Sick must sleep right? Woke up and then went for dinner at Whampoh. Bakuhteh~!  Then went Thomson cuz Spencer wanna get stuff.

Monday, didnt really pay attention in classes la~ Hahaha, i was just killing time and counting down to dance. Quite disappointed ah, didnt do much @ dance becuz of the lack of time... Practiced Sincerely Jane and teacher changed the formation alittle. Jo replaced Brenda's solo ^_^ Practice makes perfect, you'll do great babe~ Teacher put me in the front for the start. Aiyo ._. Actually, i kinda like stoning at the back until the chorus eh... Sigh, nevermind. Teacher also said she'll add people in for the center group before the floor phrase. WHY!!! There's totally no seniors inside lor. Nothing to change la! And somemore if too many people doing that, not nice la! Hope my position wont change. -_- I really dont like adapting to new environment. You know what? The worst thing that could happen, is that teacher replace my solo with someone else. HA if that really happens, that seriously proves i'm hopeless. We shall see on Thursday.

Tuesday, i passed my Chi test!! Hehehe, concentrated so much during math class that i totally forgotten to do bio homework. Copied Jonas' one hahaha. Went to trim my fringe with Jai just now ah. They cut so much!! I told them to keep my fringe length but left side cut shorter (Slant). AIYO qisiren he go cut until now like bangs. ._. Aiya dont care alr, it'll grow right?

Going to watch the Gymnastics tomorrow woohoo~! I think i'm going to die during DNT tomorrow. Seriously. ._. I totally dont know what to do with the cardboard. Ah who cares. HELLO I BLOGGED OK. Hahaaaaaa.

I love this guy so much.

HAHA TAEMIN AH~~~~!!!

CN.BLUE!

Hello! Yesterday night was a storm man. even though there were alot of people, even though we didnt buy their tickets, WE STILL GOT TO SEE THEM RIGHT! Very clearly la! It's not vividly stored in my memories okay! Hahahaha, they introduced themselves in ENGLISH you know! So cool ^_^ and some fangirls were just plain fucking lucky la! Cuz they stole a hug from Jonghyun and Yonghwa!!!! Ohmygosh!! Their concert is today!!! :( But nevermind. Im contented to see them in RL already!!!! Ima let the photos do the talking. YAY BABY!!!! Oh fyi, i'm meeting Jazreel and Jonas later. ITS BEEN SO LONG, THAT I'VE SEEN JAZREEL MY DEAR. LOL. Okay need to go and prepare already. Annyeong!!!

JOONGSHIM LOOKING HERE!!!

YOU SEE THE STUPID BITCH STANDING SO FREAKING CLOSE TO YONGHWA?! (Blueshirt)

Wa wanna punch her face!!! LOL.

JONGHYUN LOOKING AT OUR CAMERA LEH!!! HAHAHAHA.

Sorry for the blurred photos. Bad camera but its better than nothing ^_^

I got the 4 photos from online. THEY ARE WAY CLEARER LA. So envious of those infront :(

Minhyuk~!

Jonghyun~!!! (SOCUTE! HAHA)

HAHAHA YONGHWA!!!!!!

Joongshim!

Its hard to let go when thats the only thing you'd want.

When you start to know someone, all their physical characteristics start to disappear. You begin to dwell in their energy, recognize the scent of their skin. You see only the essence of the person, not the shell. That’s why you can’t fall in love with beauty. You can lust after it, be infatuated by it, want to own it. You can love it with your eyes and your body but not your heart. And that’s why, when you really connect with a person’s inner self, any physical imperfections disappear, become irrelevant.

-Lisa Unger, Beautiful Lies

Hello. When i woke up this morning, i thought it was Saturday and thought i could sleep in. When i realised that it was on Tuesday, totally killed my mood. Life's still the same. Nothing much to talk about. I nearly cried after watching this motivational video Esther how showed the class during CE period. Just watch it. I feel so guilty for being so loserish when him, without limbs and arms can live so happily.



You should totally check this dude out man. Just watch really. JUST WATCH!!!!!!! Of course i didnt cry la. Hahaa. Had MM today and it was extremely boring. Total mood (N) today. Dont ask me why. I just dont understand why i'm feeling this way. Only SHINee makes me happy hahaha.

Totally luv him <3

 Of cuz, not forgetting the rest <3<3  

Taken advantaged.

No one no longer bothers about me. "This girl is always being so negative. I bet she's trying to gain attention by doing that." Wtf if anyone of you ever thinks this way, i think i should really take a knife and stab you and me and we die together. -.- I really got no mood these days and i dont know what to do. My path of life suddenly turned so dark i thought i went blind. I really got nothing to write here. I just want to post something up. I think i'm going insane. People all preparing for PSLE, O's and A's, i'm doing nothing when i'm taking O's next year. SHANETTE AH!!!!!! Fucking hopeless sia you. 

I fell right thru the cracks, now i'm trying to get back.

Hey I've been watching you, every little thing you do.

Every time I see you pass in my homeroom class, makes my heart beat fast.

Wish I could make it real but your lips are sealed, that ain't no big deal.

I think you're fine. You really blow my mind.

Maybe someday, you and me can run away.

I just want you to know, I wanna be your Juliet.

Hey Romeo

Hihi. School was as usual today, except i yawned alot. Tumblr wasnt working on my phone when i was in school. Made me kinda upset and bored too. Cuz i cannot see my SHINee faces :( Haha.. I was planning to trim my hairends off after school. Yvonne suggested to bring me to the place where she always cut her hair. But the shop didnt open for god knows what reason. So i ended up going home. The weather was so hot! However it changed the moment i reached home. I feel as if the sky's gonna turn dark in minutes but its actually only 6.15pm. HAHA.

I want to be pretty. I want pretty features so i do not need to hide behind my hair ._. So that I can clip up all my hair that seriously itches my face. Ugh nonsense what's wih my inbalanced features, YOU TELL ME LA. Zzz have been seriously moody these days. I'm not sure if my posts can tell how i feel. Most of the time when i'm really upset, i wouldnt have the mood to use the computer. All i want to do, is to sleep. -_- I've been eating alot recently too. For me, thats obviously a sign of moodiness. Usually my clique would eat waaaaaay more than me even though i'm the biggest monster in the clique. Now ah, i follow them sia. They say eat, i eat. How much food also gobble everything down. Eat so much until my skirt like so tight now. DAMNNNNNN.

Yesterday talked to Daddy in the night. He talked to me about something about my sleeping hours. It's not that i dont want to sleep la!!! But during the night, is the only time when i can think of everything that has happened during the day. Things i regret, things i feel proud of(none most of the time.), things i really wish to change etc. So obviously i got loads of negative ions in my head la. Hence, insomnia. -_-

Shanette ah shanette.....

Will i be able to pull through?

The thought of dropping to Normal Acadamic is scaring me once again. Sigh Shanette became a fucking loser. Let's rewind back to the past and i'll tell you how pathetic my school life has become.

In Primary school, i used to score Band1s for almost everything. When i dont, parents would definitely cane me for not studying. I remember i even compared Math marks with Dennis Yeo when we were in the same class. But without fail, he'd definitely score afew marks higher than me, which really pisses me off. Nevermind, because that was the motivation for me to work harder to beat that idiot's score.

The first time i failed a subject was in Primary 4. And the subject was, Science. It was always Science! I cried so badly even though i only failed by 1mark. I knew my mother would murder me, literally. Worst thing was, Dennis' parents knew my parents and he was in the same class as me. I trusted him and told him my marks, hoping that he would help me keep this secret. Ha true enough, he went to tell his mother and blahblahblah. Go guess what happened yourself. -_-

Primary 5, my math started to get from bad to worst. Because that year was the year with a booklet B which is upon 80marks. 50marks was Section C, PROBLEM SUMS. Worst nightmare for most of the people who hated math. So i struggled badly during 3/4 of the year, always getting a C6. Some miracle happened during EOY, as i scored a 70/100. I totally cried infront of the whole class and obviously it was tears of joy. I tell you even the teacher was shocked with my score. -_-
(Fyi, i never had problems with English nor Chinese in Primary School.)

Primary 6, i got transferred to Zhonghua primary and therefore, a new start. I have big problems with adapting so obviously, it affected me and my studies very badly. Well, i passed all my subjects. All borderline only. Like 50-60plus. & PSLE, i managed to squeeze in to Express Course. Mother suggested me to go take NA course but in a good school but i chose EXP in a neighbourhood school. I just wouldnt listen to people's advices.

Sec1, didnt do very badly. Humanities was my weakest subject, as usual. My first F9 was for Geography. The rest, i got like As and Bs. However, i started to mix with people who goes out every single day like everyday's holiday and blahblahblah. All those nonsense. ._. I ended up not studying and fail all my classtests. CT2, did very badly. Like nothing passed except math, english and chinese. Got into deep shit when EOY was nearing and parents found out. So they pushed me hard for my exam, and, i passed everything except for Science and Humanities and Homec.

Sec2, transferred again to Bishan Park Secondary. Totally mental breakdown. Everyday also cry because i totally couldnt adapt to the environment. I thought people there were very friendly but soon after greeting Hi, they started to ignore me. None of them would accept me into their clique. & i was always either alone or with Chuanzhen. Fucking pathetic. A quarter year passed, i finally made friends with Jazreel, Charlotte and Yolande. They were my life saviours for the year. Without them, HOW THE HECK AM I GONNA SURVIVE IN BPS?! I did tremendously well for CT1, and then started to become bad once again. ._. Failed Humanities & Science. Parents expected me to go into Pure stream but i obviously failed them.

Sec3, the optimum point reached. FAILING EVERY SINGLE SUBJECT, INCLUDING ENGLISH FOR GOD KNOWS WHAT REASON! Yeah, i'm a mother fucking loser. I think i'll grow up to sweep the floors. I want to go into Lasalle. In order to go there, i need an O level certificate. You know, i really dont care how bad i dance. I know for dance, no matter how hard it is, i'll definitely strive for it. Sigh.

This CT, i know i improved. But SO WHAT?! It's only fugging 15%. SA2 is 45%. I got like 48% or something like that for the last half of the year. CAN I MAKE IT? I really dont know. I dont wish to lose hope for myself. But c'mon, its really time to face reality. I only left 1month. ONE BLOODY MONTH TO CATCH UP A YEAR'S WORK! -_- I really wished a miracle could happened to me right now, really.. Did i mention that i couldnt sleep last night, just wondering what would happen to me when i get laterally transferred to NA? :( Ugh. I wished i could bribe the person who's gonna promote me.


Another issue, my face. ITS REALLY GONE CASE. Sigh. I hate myself i swear. I wished i had fucking rich parents and they would bring me to everywhere to cure my face regardless of the price. Fuck it will never happen.

Electric Heart

Hihihihihi. I'm so loving my ipod now. HAHAHA. It's like updated yo! Aish, i only updated Korean songs. English one, i'm updating now hehehee. Tomorrow liqian can go see see my newly updated ipod already.

I cannot wait to go out with Jazreel and Jonas this coming Saturday. & the Saturday after that, i'm gonna see my awesome childhood friend, Fion Lee En Qi~! Hahaaaa. Now i only needa find people to go cycling with me. I feel so sad becuz of this la. I havent cycled for like a good 6months. -_- Hope i can go cycling this coming Friday... :( I wanna cycle badly!

Did nothing today. Just entertained myself with dramas. First, this hk drama, idk call what name. Channel 855 and 856 always play in the morning and afternoon one. Then watched Starking. Gosh hilarious to the max! Lets go dreamteam next. SO CUTE LA. MINHO WAS SO BABY LOOKING. Ohman so cute!!! I kinda think he shouldnt cut his hair short lor. He look so nice with long hair :( Went to have dinner after that and came home to watch Rosy Business. Such a nice show. :D HK dramas best man, really ^_^.

Tomorrow's schoool again. How i wished i can go Thailand during the sept holidays. I want major shopping spreeeeee. Ok forget about that. It aint gonna happen. Let's talk about something more realistic. Like, THE UPCOMING TEACHER'S DAY PERFORMANCE!!!! Gosh fat costume alert, Shanette. HOW TO SLIM DOWN AH?! Can i have like a personal trainer anot. ._. Can la, if you got the money, Shanette... LOL.

NOTHING TO POST ALREADY HAHAHA.

I LOVE샤이니(SHINee)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

An unachievable love is still love.

Hello! There's nothing that i wanna say about my day today. It's just the same thing everyday! The thing that brought my whole mood up was, MY MOM FIXED THE COMPUTER!!! What an expert man! I was freaking screaming and jumping with joy AT NIGHT man HAHAHA. So yeah, started downloading all the songs and videos that i wanted to for the past 1 and the half weeks. Only managed to downloaded 25songs. The computer was too lag. I'm already freaking thankful the computer managed to pull through whatever tough times it was going thru la! HAHA.

I'm so addicted to this two songs currently: 내가 사랑했던 이름(The Name I loved) by Onew & Life by SHINee. They are so meaningful and touching!! Ohman :( Hahaaa, getting too emotional over songs these days. Cuz the singer really can express that kind of feeling ma! Haha.. & I think i'm insane. All of a sudden, i'm mad in love with Mickey Mouse & Hello Kitty. -_- Wth is wrong with me?!

Taemin Saranghae! Hehe. (L)!!!

Thanks for producing such an awesome solo song.

ONEW, ROCK ON!!! (L)

My hands become cold.

The memory of love coldly draws near.

It becomes painful.

I don't want to be unfair to you any longer.

Knowing that I can't love you,

Who is close to me,

Who can't look at me,

It's too hard to wait,

I can't stand it anymore.

Since it won't be achievable.

That name I loved became too distant as I went out to call it.

I now write that name down. I'm on the verge of tears.

I want to hide within myself.

Remember that day now where all I could do was love you.

Because an unachievable love is still love.

The feeling of love

That you can't do alone comes to me

The longings that I can't even start only get bigger

Only your scent is left

In the cold, corner of my heart

Turn back a thousand times to the moment we first went to that point.

I'll take away everything from that one corner of my heart.

내가 사랑했던 이름(The Name I loved) - Onew ft. Yeonwoo