In Primary school, i used to score Band1s for almost everything. When i dont, parents would definitely cane me for not studying. I remember i even compared Math marks with Dennis Yeo when we were in the same class. But without fail, he'd definitely score afew marks higher than me, which really pisses me off. Nevermind, because that was the motivation for me to work harder to beat that idiot's score.
The first time i failed a subject was in Primary 4. And the subject was, Science. It was always Science! I cried so badly even though i only failed by 1mark. I knew my mother would murder me, literally. Worst thing was, Dennis' parents knew my parents and he was in the same class as me. I trusted him and told him my marks, hoping that he would help me keep this secret. Ha true enough, he went to tell his mother and blahblahblah. Go guess what happened yourself. -_-
Primary 5, my math started to get from bad to worst. Because that year was the year with a booklet B which is upon 80marks. 50marks was Section C, PROBLEM SUMS. Worst nightmare for most of the people who hated math. So i struggled badly during 3/4 of the year, always getting a C6. Some miracle happened during EOY, as i scored a 70/100. I totally cried infront of the whole class and obviously it was tears of joy. I tell you even the teacher was shocked with my score. -_-
(Fyi, i never had problems with English nor Chinese in Primary School.)
Primary 6, i got transferred to Zhonghua primary and therefore, a new start. I have big problems with adapting so obviously, it affected me and my studies very badly. Well, i passed all my subjects. All borderline only. Like 50-60plus. & PSLE, i managed to squeeze in to Express Course. Mother suggested me to go take NA course but in a good school but i chose EXP in a neighbourhood school. I just wouldnt listen to people's advices.
Sec1, didnt do very badly. Humanities was my weakest subject, as usual. My first F9 was for Geography. The rest, i got like As and Bs. However, i started to mix with people who goes out every single day like everyday's holiday and blahblahblah. All those nonsense. ._. I ended up not studying and fail all my classtests. CT2, did very badly. Like nothing passed except math, english and chinese. Got into deep shit when EOY was nearing and parents found out. So they pushed me hard for my exam, and, i passed everything except for Science and Humanities and Homec.
Sec2, transferred again to Bishan Park Secondary. Totally mental breakdown. Everyday also cry because i totally couldnt adapt to the environment. I thought people there were very friendly but soon after greeting Hi, they started to ignore me. None of them would accept me into their clique. & i was always either alone or with Chuanzhen. Fucking pathetic. A quarter year passed, i finally made friends with Jazreel, Charlotte and Yolande. They were my life saviours for the year. Without them, HOW THE HECK AM I GONNA SURVIVE IN BPS?! I did tremendously well for CT1, and then started to become bad once again. ._. Failed Humanities & Science. Parents expected me to go into Pure stream but i obviously failed them.
Sec3, the optimum point reached. FAILING EVERY SINGLE SUBJECT, INCLUDING ENGLISH FOR GOD KNOWS WHAT REASON! Yeah, i'm a mother fucking loser. I think i'll grow up to sweep the floors. I want to go into Lasalle. In order to go there, i need an O level certificate. You know, i really dont care how bad i dance. I know for dance, no matter how hard it is, i'll definitely strive for it. Sigh.
This CT, i know i improved. But SO WHAT?! It's only fugging 15%. SA2 is 45%. I got like 48% or something like that for the last half of the year. CAN I MAKE IT? I really dont know. I dont wish to lose hope for myself. But c'mon, its really time to face reality. I only left 1month. ONE BLOODY MONTH TO CATCH UP A YEAR'S WORK! -_- I really wished a miracle could happened to me right now, really.. Did i mention that i couldnt sleep last night, just wondering what would happen to me when i get laterally transferred to NA? :( Ugh. I wished i could bribe the person who's gonna promote me.
Another issue, my face. ITS REALLY GONE CASE. Sigh. I hate myself i swear. I wished i had fucking rich parents and they would bring me to everywhere to cure my face regardless of the price. Fuck it will never happen.
